June Caption Contest! Win $25!

 Posted by on June 7, 2012
Jun 072012
 

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Hello dear readers and commenters and lurkers and loyal Hasidim! It’s that time of the month again, the time when you have the very rare and wonderful opportunity to put a caption on an as-of-yet uncaptioned cartoon… and win a very valuable prize in the process! Yes, the winning caption, chosen by the same mysterious process as before, will win $25 REAL dollars again!

Please vote (click ‘like’) on the comment containing the caption you like most. We may or may not take your vote into account: that is part of the mystery. Exciting! Here, the cartoon… but first, let me thank all the entrants in last month’s caption contest. Thank you! You make this blog what it is. Yes, yes, the cartoon:

A Hasidic woman on a therapy couch

Therapy

Frieda Vizel

In between raising her son, racing triathlons and cramming for graduate school, Frieda keeps busy by doodling and writing essays about her transition from Hasidism to life as a woman who charts her own creative path, trials, blessings and all.

  55 Responses to “June Caption Contest! Win $25!”

  1. Now that I know about everything that’s out there- the art, the food, the culture- I feel so trapped in my own life. Sometimes…sometimes I wish I never stepped foot on Avenue J.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 3 Thumb down 0

  2. So, I asked my husband, “if I become a man, will you still love me?”

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 2 Thumb down 0

  3. Chassidish OCD

    “So did you really leave the door open a crack?”

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 8 Thumb down 0

  4. “My husband wants to leave the lights on, take off my nightgown, and touch my breasts. I worry it will shat for shedicam.”

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 3 Thumb down 0

  5. Oh, wait, I forgot to sign in before submitting the above comment. I can use the $25.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  6. I feel soo horny right now!! Just shaved……..my u know what! Some call it bi hoor. You can see It now as Im lying down. Wanna join?

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  7. אן ארנטליכער גוי אבער וואס פארשטייט ער באמת

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 13 Thumb down 0

  8. thank you for the “babkeh”

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 3 Thumb down 0

  9. I was always taught not to “sit” next to men!

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 5 Thumb down 0

  10. “Sometime I can’t help thinking… maybe things really aren’t baruch hashem?”

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 6 Thumb down 0

  11. “So those king-sized beds are for group therapy?”

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 6 Thumb down 0

  12. “Now that my head has touched your elbow, how long before we have sex?”

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 1 Thumb down 0

  13. “Other than that, we are wonderful.”

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 8 Thumb down 0

  14. Why does he have me on the couch?!?! They were right…..all psychotherapists are perverts.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 3 Thumb down 0

  15. It’s been almost three years since we had our last child, and we only have 6. Meanwhile, my friend who was the first out of our age to marry is already at 10! I feel left out of society :(

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 7 Thumb down 0

  16. “I just always have that fear that my hair might be showing through my Burberry shpitzel and people will find out that I have hair – mainly my husband.”

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 1 Thumb down 0

  17. “So Dr. Freud, If I said Perek Shira and Chalom Chulomti can you still interpret my dreams?”
    “I’m pretty sure I don’t have Penis Envy, I fargin everyone. Wait, how do you say fargin in English?”
    “I think my subconscious is a goy, is yours a yid?”

    “I know you have degree from Harvard Medical, but do you have a Daas Torah?”
    “Should I prepare neigal vasser?”

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 7 Thumb down 0

  18. He said I should lie to the therapist.

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 9 Thumb down 1

  19. “My husband went meshuganah, he asked me to put it in my mouth. I think he needs to be institutionalized”

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 2 Thumb down 0

  20. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I just don’t feel oppressed.”

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 16 Thumb down 0

  21. “So anyway, I just came in to say that we love our husbands and we rock the sack (magna cum laude, baby!) and we really love to shave our heads!”

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 6 Thumb down 0

  22. mr. freud: we tend to blame our “shvigers” not our mothers

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 5 Thumb down 0

  23. “Uh, are you a psychologist or a psychiatrist? What’s the difference anyway?”

    “So can you know what I’m thinking now?”

    “Before we start, you do accept food-stamps, right?”

    “This position has become boreding after 10 years, but my husband insists that this is the only one halachacally OK.”

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 2 Thumb down 0

  24. “there are some things a woman knows intuitively….he curls his peyos more, and in front of the mirror for example…”

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 2 Thumb down 0

  25. so I really don’t know if changing to a “aroopgebindene-sheitel” will make me happy…?!

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 4 Thumb down 0

  26. “…and if that wasn’t enough, now my daughter’s making cartoons about us too! And she puts them on the internet! Why is she doing this to me?”

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 9 Thumb down 0

  27. “So what do you think these dreams about keegel are telling me?”

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 3 Thumb down 0

  28. “It’s creepy to live with the fact that we’re the only in our community with access to the internet who haven’t divorced yet.”

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 3 Thumb down 1

  29. I fear i”m having these crazy thoughts like my OTD sister had when she “went crazy”

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 2 Thumb down 0

  30. Is it really true what the goishe car service driver said? I’m not the only Chasiddishe who sees a Psychiatrist?

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 2 Thumb down 0

  31. I don’t know what has gotten into my husband. Lately he insists on using a filter.

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 6 Thumb down 0

  32. Is that ‘id’ with a yud?

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 2 Thumb down 0

  33. Why did you let the artist in, I prefer doing what we normally do.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 1 Thumb down 0

  34. “Can I tell you a secret?” The only reason I still see you is because I love to talk to guys. You are the only male other than my husband I’m allowed to talk to. Please don’t tell anyone.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 2 Thumb down 0

  35. “Why would you say he sexually abuses me? He’s just trying to be nice to me!” He lets me take a nap during mu lunch break because I work hard.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  36. “And the very next day Mindi strolls out with her Yellow canopied Bugaboo, rendering my sand canopy worthless!”

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 6 Thumb down 0

  37. Ereb Pes complex? What kehileh is that?

    Electric complex?

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 2 Thumb down 0

  38. If you don’t want me to look at you why not just put up a mechitza?

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 1 Thumb down 0

  39. “Didn’t have much of a career really, but this, THIS is an (unwavering) ‘position’ I’ve frequently held since I got married.”

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  40. Herr Doktor, when was the last time you cleaned this couch?!

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 1 Thumb down 0

  41. Duktur Fraynd, any relation to the Fraynd family on Keap Street?

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 9 Thumb down 0

  42. He really doesn’t understand anything about us, what a waste of money.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  43. Wait, let me get this straight. You took off your panties, handed them to the rabbi and then he took out a magnifying glass?

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 11 Thumb down 0

  44. Surale’s potato kigel is always better than my potato kigel. I’ll never amount to anything!

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  45. My son is a tchatchke, but my daughter nebech is a shiksa.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  46. Doktor will it hurt?

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  47. I’m telling you Mr. Fertility Counselor, launching a babysitting service would be great for business!

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 1 Thumb down 0

  48. Finally, a goyishe therapist – him at least I can masser if he makes me suck his c**k.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 1 Thumb down 0

  49. so the good news and the bad news is I’m pregnant again.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 2 Thumb down 0

  50. I have been spotting for 3 months straight I can’t take it anymore..!

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 2 Thumb down 0

  51. Fritlech or wafer cake, that is the question.

    Talk about existential angst!

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 1 Thumb down 0

  52. For a moment there I though of going over to my neighbour for that kugel recipe, then I remembered that have internet at home.

    How can I ever forgive myself?

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 1 Thumb down 0

  53. (thinks) Oy gevald… maybe my sister was right and my tichel is too `rashig` (attractive), and maybe i should not have worn this tight t-shirt…i`m afraid the doctor is into me now…

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  54. I 4got to sign in 4 the above comment, but i`ve wanted to support ur amazing work for a long time (but haven`t gotten any $) so in case i win, plz take the 25$ 4 ur blog expenses…

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

  55. [...] The June Caption Contest got some incredibly interesting, insightful and funny submissions. The contest cartoon was of a Chasidic woman lying on the Freudian therapy bed and a very unreligious looking, goateed doctor listening to her lamant. I always enjoy drawing the contest and wondering where the readers will take it. All over the place, is the answer. You guys rock! Thank you for all your contributions. It was so fun! Ideally, every one who contributed should win $25, but ideally everyone should also contribute $25 for the blog site maintenance, so we’re kind of even. [...]

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

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